Chuck's Chilidog Stand - Blazin' Back for More

[Leedzie]

After handing poor Dashiel a towel, Uncle Chuck's attention diverted for a moment; he'd decided to turn on the radio.

"And in other news today, a riot broke out in the arcade district of Casinopolis when the DDR machines all simulatenously went offline. This prompted taunts from the Guitar Hero and ParaParaParadise fans as to which music game was the best. A few bloody noses and broken guitar-shaped controllers later, the streets were filled with angry gamers wondering why Samba De Amigo was never more widespread. In the end riot police were able to placate the crowd by firing copies of Donkey Konga into the angry mob. Only a handful of people were injured. And they all died."

Chuck cackled and switched off the radio. "I LOVE THIS TOWN!!!"

[Raki]

Dash graciously accepted the towel and began to attempt to wipe himself off. No amount of scrubbing in the world would probably get it all off (at least, not without water), but it was worth the try. He was probably going to smell like ketchup all day until he finally managed to get to a shower...

rouge said:

Chuck cackled and switched off the radio. "I LOVE THIS TOWN!!!"

And the tenrec muttered, "I sure as heck don't..."

[Topaz Mutiny]

Tails swished his namesakes happily- Success! He looked at the cannister as a kid might look at a free pass to Seven Banners, then looked to Mina.

"Sure you can apologise, though I'm pretty positive nothing bad will happen," he answered. He paused to listen to the radio, which only seemed to emphasize the fact that this town was apocolyptic, then said, "Come on! I can't wait to see if this works!" He leapt over the counter with ease, using his two tails to help, and rushed into the building.

Sigh.

Inventors.

[AnT]

When she heard that, Mina was unsure if Tails meant those in company of him, including her, to boldly go where probably no mere mortal gone before...

....the back of Chuck's Stand.

Mina turned to Katie, with a look of confusion and nervousiness, and a bit of excitement. "Um...d-does he mean...all of us? I'm not sure I'm allowed in...t-there."

[Lans]

Katie just sighed, the got up and grabbed Mina's arm, dragging her along after Tails. "Come on girl, its your friends stuff, so you deserve to see if it blows him up or not."

[SonicLover]

((Since DB kinda broke the posting order by posting after Leda, I guess I can go ahead and post now...))


Saul had been eavesdropping on the Tails-and-co. exchange, but it really hadn't interested him until now. He watched as Tails rushed backstage with that can of whatever that mongoose had brought with her. And now those two were following her, while the old guy running the stand didn't even bat an eyelid. Saul was noticeably intrigued by this; it could have something to do with Sonic, after all.

Curious, Saul waved over to the proprietor with the white mustache- whose name he never did get- and asked the question: "Um... are you aware that Tails has just gone into the area behind you followed by a fox and a mongoose?"

[Leedzie]

"Tails is free to head back," Uncle Chuck replied, though his mouth was full of chili and hogdog. "And from what I got from my broken eavesdropping, Katie and Mina have cause to go with him. I don't mind." The old hedgehog stretched; business seemed to be winding down. He might actually get to close down the stand without incident for once!

[SonicLover]

((I know it isn't my turn yet, but I need to write all my characters out if I'm going to be banned...))


Saul was about to ask why Tails was heading backstage when an awful smell hit his nose. It smelled like... spray can fumes. The stench was unbearable, so Saul was gone in three seconds. He didn't even stop to pay the check. (EXIT SAUL)

[Leedzie]

"HEY!!!" Chuck shouted, but he was too late; Saul was already down the street and around the corner. The old hedgehog glared. He may have made it a habit to give away free food, but that was a priviledge allotted to his favorite customers, not a right for just anyone to cash in on. Uncle Chuck bitterly whipped his towel under the counter. "Dirty little... If I wasn't old and he wasn't on skates, I'd have dragged him back here to the register!"

[Rix]

A tiny robotic snake crawled up onto the counter and stared at Chuck intensely.

[Leedzie]

"IS THAT A CREATURE IN NEED OF AID?!"

Without warning a demon banshee human came barreling down the street, and came to a screeching halt next to the tenrec still lightly coated in ketchup. Peta's eyes flared with all the fires of hell as she abruptly lifted poor Dash into the air and looked up into his undoubtedly bewildered eyes. "Oh poor, poor little porcupine!! WHO HAS BEEN ABUSING YOU?! Look at all the blood staining your fur!!"

[Raki]

And Dash... found himself suspended in the air.

By what seemed to be a crazy person.

A crazy person who called him a porcupine.

A crazy person asking who had who abused him.

"... the... ketchup... dispenser?"

Really, he had no idea what to tell her.

[Rix]

In the meantime a couple more robotic snakes slithered up near the counter.

And stared.

[Leedzie]

"Why, good day, madam!" Chuck's muffled greeting rang out. It was muffled because he'd since re-donned his welding mask and oven mits. Uncle Chuck may not have known Peta personally, but she was well-known as a vigilante for "animal rights" -- which for some reason always meant putting them to sleep.

So he was quite interested in hiding the fact that he was an animal.

"Say, madam," he began again, as muffled as ever, "maybe you should set the, er, 'porcupine' down, and I can get you a nice cold drink? ... And valium?"

[Rix]

And suddenly Bash came in, destroying things with his footsteps as he bounded forth. Behind him trailed a small army of robot snakes.

"Arise, arise, Riders of Résson!
Fell deeds awake, fire and slaughter!
spear shall be shaken, shield be splintered,
a snake-day, a red day, ere the sun rises!
Ride now, ride now! Ride to the Chilidog Stand!!"

Bash kicks a stool over, laughing maniacally as the snakes begin staring at and crawling all over everything.

[Leedzie]

Peta's wrath was turned upon Chuck. Luckily she hadn't seen him change into his welding mask, or he might've fallen victim to her "help" as well. "SIR," she shouted, though he was right next to her, "HOW DARE YOU ALLOW AN INNOCENT PORCUPINE TO FALL VICTIM TO A VICIOUS KETCHUP DISPENSER?! HAVE YOU NO SENSE OF DECENCY?!


Behind the mask, Chuck just smiled brightly. "NOPE."

At that moment he noticed the herd of snakes gathering around his stand, and blinked. Is there such a service as robotic extermination?


"VILE FIEND!" the woman bellowed. "I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO CONTINUE TO ABUSE THIS POOR CREATURE!!" Peta turned to Dash, still suspended in the air, and grinned at him. A very wide, toothy grin. "Fear not, prickly woodland inhabitant!! I'LL PUT AN END TO YOUR SUFFERING!!

But just then Bash showed up, and began kicking over stools. Which took a lot of force, since they were bolted to the sidewalk.

Peta's face lit up enthusiastically. "What a marvelous idea, proud pooch of punctuality!!" She didn't know what "punctuality" meant. "LET US WAGE WAR ON THIS STAND OF TOMATO PASTE AGGRESSION!!" Tucking Dash under one arm, Peta turn to kick down a stool, but just ended up smashing her leg into the iron and fell to the sidewalk in pain.

She might've landed on Dash a little. Ow.


"H'oooooh boy," Chuck side, rolling his eyes through the welding mask's little window. So much for closing without incident. Climbing onto the counter, the old hedgehog announced, "ALRIGHT, GUYS, IT'S TIME TO MOVE THE MONKEY BUSINESS DOWN THE STREET."

Uncle Chuck raised the mask briefly to look at Elbot and Bogert (yes, they're still hanging around). "If you value your lives, or at least your sanity, you may want to run. NOW."

[Jamie Lee]

A flash of light, and a robotic feline, an android and a humanoid robot appeared on the street near the stand.
The feline of the group skipped up to the counter, apparently oblivious to the chaos happening around her, and waved happily at everyone.
"Hiiii!" she greeted presently "Like, have any of you seen a purple cat? I'm looking for her!"
Of course, her emerald radar told her that said cat was right above her in the building she was standing at.

[Raki]

"If you value your lives, or at least your sanity, you may want to run. NOW."

Bogert grinned stupidly and stood up from his seat.

"Well, okay. Bye then!" And then he ran. Ran like he had just been set on fire by Maze, though he hadn't been.


And... Dash was pinned under a crazy woman. And bristling. With indignation. "GET. OFF. OF. ME."

[Rix]

Bash threw a metallic snake at a bottle of ketchup, shattering it. He looked indignantly at Maze whilst more snakes crawled loyally over him. "Hey! This my my stand! Find your own place to crash!"

He poses dramatically, flexing his muscles a few times before pointing at her in a commanding gesture. "GET HER, MY SERPENTINE BRETHEREN!"

AND THEN THE SNAKES CRAWLED ALL OVER MAZE.

[dice=6]



Meanwhile, Selica stood slightly behind Maze, looking rather embarrassed. "I DO NOT KNOW HER."[rand=82568702014095044686922244036454474505582489810885065393372548247]

[Leedzie]

Recovering from her self-inflicted leg wound, Peta popped back to her feet, Dash still in tow. "YOU!! Mechanical mistress of mayhem!! Do you DARE to obstruct the melodious mind of this dignified doggy?!" She apparently didn't know what "melodious" meant, either.

Regardless, Peta took a fierce stand next to Bash and began beating Maze. ... With Dash.


Just then the metal gates that sealed off the chili dog stand slammed down with a loud CRASH. Uncle Chuck flicked on a light inside and crossed to a control box near the back wall. Normally he might've let things continue on for a bit longer, but at Maze's mention of "a purple cat" she was looking for, the old hedgehog decided to be cautious. Destruction to his stand wasn't an issue -- that happened almost every day -- but damage to his personal living space wasn't something he particularly invited.

But he still couldn't resist messing with the group.

Outside, a section of bricks in the building to the left of the stand began to pull backwards, revealing a hollow chamber. That opening was quickly obstructed by a rather large cannon. Via the controls in the back of the stand, Chuck maneuvered the weapon through the opening and pointed it toward the scuffling group on the sidewalk. A small plushie doll of a squid apparently had been mounted on top of the cannon -- a doll that was fixed with a radio trasmitter.

"Heeeeey, kids!" Chuck cheerfully greeted through a microphone. "Not that this spectacle wouldn't make a great story to tell, but in the interest of home and hearth, I'm gonna have to ask you to take your monkey business down the street!"

[Jamie Lee]

[dice=6]

AND MAZE WAS COVERED IN SNAKES.

That just stared at her. Intensely.

She started giggling hysterically and began petting them "Dawww, aren't you guys adorable!"

Then she blinked in surprise when the grate suddenly slammed down, looking at it and tilting her head to one side "Like, hey, I asked a question!"

She didn't seem to be notice she was being beaten with a tenrec.[rand=58571347061554071287244933757216753092150538129736208436387176274]

[Rix]

Selica growled angrily, her jets revving involuntarily. "Come on! Stop messing around ! Let's just get the emeralds and go so I can get to more IMPORTANT THINGS!!"

Like reaching level 43 on Tetris.



Meanwhile, Bash was flexing his muscles and kicking over more stools, paying no heed to the warning.

[Raki]

"OW, OW, OW, OW, OW, STOP YOU CRAZY CHIMPANZEE!"

[Tony]

Just then, a blue ball of FLUFF rolled down the stairs, BOUNCED out of the stand, and continued rolling on down the street, as if that was the most everyday thing ever.

[Leedzie]

Chuck was rather surprised when the wad of fur that was his nephew careened down the stairs and out the back door. He paused, and blinked. Then shrugged. "Oh well, business as usual."

Back to the business at hand. While things didn't seem quite as over-the-top as the usual chaos that ensued at the end of the business day, that doberman was kicking over his stools -- quite a feat considering that they were bolted to the ground -- and that poor tenrec was being used as a blunt object. Uncle Chuck figured he should probably intervene at least for Dash's sake.

"Alright, kids," the squid plushie announced, "five more seconds to get off the property. Five... Four... Three..."


At that moment Peta seemed to notice Dash's screaming and flailing, and held him up to the light for a better look at him. "WHY, YOU POOR PRICKLY CREATURE!! Tell me, who has been abusing you?! You look TERRIBLE! Why, I vow here and now to take out whatever tryannical titan has been tormenting this tedious tenr--" And that was as far as she got before a spray of pickles with the force of a firehose came blasting out of Chuck's cannon.

Yeah, didn't know what "tedious" means, either.

[Sipp]

". . ."

".... What in the name of all that is holy is going on here?!"

[AnT]

Then right after that blue furrball roll down the street, Mina the Mongoose quickly stampede down stairs and out the side door, trying to chase after that fuzzball.

"I'msorry!Sorry!Sorry!Sorry!Sorry!Sorry!Sor---"

But it was too late, she found out as she helplessly watched Sonic roll down the street. She shuddered as she tried to reach him, but seeing such a feat impossible without strechy powers, Mina dropped to her knees.

Her hero, her idol...her crush...she finally met him, but just like in her nightmares, she led him to trouble. He probably hated her now for turning him into a furrball and laughing at him. Why, she though, why did she try to stop herself from laughing? If she stopped being so stupid and-

---and then she saw a familiar face smashing the stand with a brown hedgehog. A tall human lady in a trenchcoat.

"Oh no, not her!!!" she cried in shock. She knew of that Peta lady; afterall, her reign of terror always happens in Westopolis. One time, this woman invaded her school and tried to...'save' the anthro students...

...although, some of those students were some girls Mina hated...but still, they did get hurt.

"What's going on---?" And that's when she saw them...wrigly green things all around some cat robot. Strange creatures that caused Mina's brow to twitch.

[Jamie Lee]

Maze glanced at the furball as it rolled away and arched her brow at it. Looking back at the barrel at the hedgehog finished his countdown, Maze leapt up, giving a boost from her jets to propel her further into the air and landed on the awning as she watched Peta suffer the wrath of pickles. Her stunt had simultaneously caused the pickle juice to be set alight.

After sitting on the awning for a few seconds like that, there came a loud creak as it shuddered beneath her weight. Rather than the whole thing crashing down however, there was a loud RIIIIIIIP as the fabric tore and caused her to fall straight through and land on one of the stools Bash had yet to kick over.

She paused to stare blankly for a moment, wondering what in the world had just happened, then leaned forward and giggled hysterically into her palm. That was so much fun!

[L]

Elbot, who had relocated himself atop the stand after being throttled the last time by Leda and fallen asleep, was awakened by ensuing chaos below. Having a small trickle of commonsense, the groggy slipper lobster took off, hoping to escape before something exploded.

[Leedzie]

"I CANNOT ALLOW THIS KIND OF ABUSE TO CONTINUE!!" Peta shouted vehemently, flinging pickles from her face. "I AM GOING TO SUE THIS ESTABLISHMENT FOR ITS TORMENT OF SPLENDID SPINEY SPECIMENS OF SPONTANEITY!! I'm going to put this poor animal out if its miser--"

It was at that moment that Peta realized she'd lost track of Dash.

...

And another moment still until she realized she was sitting on him.

"POOR PARASITE!!" Apparently she thought 'parasite' was a synonym for 'unluckiest tenrec in the world'. "Fear not, furry friend!! Peta will put an end to this suffering!!!" Tucking Dash under her arm, Peta sprinted down the street, leaving a trail of pickles and pickle juice behind her.


Inside the fortress of the chili dog stand, Chuck screwed his mouth to one side. "Well, that's one down (and a particularly troublesome one, at that), but apparently I've got a hydra outside: get rid of one nutjob off, three more take its place."

Just then Mina came down the stairs, and Uncle Chuck blinked as she blazed by. A thought about preventing her from going out idly crossed his mind, but she was already out the door before his old muscles reacted. Again the hedgehog blinked. ".... No good can come of this."